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Name: Talya Peachfeather
E-Mail:
Subject: RE: RE: RE: mom...i joined the club...nsc
Date: Monday, March 09, 2015
Time: 10:32:31 AM
Remote Address: 91.125.118.10
Message ID: 292529
Parent ID: 292513
Thread ID: 292381
Sadly the only memories I have of her being nice to me are the times when I took her out of lunch or for a makeover when she was having a pity party so she wouldn't be mean to me. I have nightmare memories from my childhood, when I wrote my Mum's tombstone I struggled for words and could only say that she was a good friend and a good wife - for she gave my Dad a lot of practical support. I knew I couldn't say she was a cruel mother, so I left out "mother" completely. I gave a good eulogy so that it looked good to all her friends and so on!!! The photos are meaningless to me, the memories not worthy of memory - she shared the same birthday as Steve Marriott - I have happier memories of his kindness when I was young. He taught me the meaning of hospitality and human kindness.
You're so lucky to have good memories to hold onto - far better than to be haunted by living nightmares!!! You're very lucky that you could turn to your parents for advice and support - I never had any of those experiences, just had to figure out life as it showed up, and it was a bit hit & miss - from my late teens I've said that home is where my feet are at any given time (which as anyone who's had the experience of home knows, is a long way from what you'd call home). My mother wasn't capable of being a mother, she hated my very presence in the house and she looked at me with hostility and indifference. It was a bleak childhood that led to a bleak adulthood. People see a damaged person and move on to the next one because there's so many people in this world. I spent years trying not to believe in karma, but at the end of the day, karma is all there is, we're powerless over it. I don't look at family photos, though I do have a few of the photos from the makeover she and I went to 'cos we both look very glam and the way in which I did care for her (more as if she was my daughter) shines through. Anyway, I'm glad you've got good memories of your mom and your childhood - you're very lucky to have had the support of two parents, and to have had healthy role models to guide you in life.
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